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PRINT: I'm an Isekai Hero! Of Course I'm Fighting a Demon Lord (Monster Girl Tamer #2) (SIGNED Paperback)
PRINT: I'm an Isekai Hero! Of Course I'm Fighting a Demon Lord (Monster Girl Tamer #2) (SIGNED Paperback)
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Book Two in the Monster Girl Tamer series. Published by Spice Rack Press.
About this premium SIGNED PAPERBACK:
Signed by Edie Skye. Contact us at holowriting (at) holowriting.com for personalization requests.
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A thicc cowgirl with a thicker accent. A bookish succubus with an absurd secret. A demon, goblin, and oni girl who’re as chaotic as they are good.
And they’re going to defeat a demon lord … how?
It’s been three months since Axel Hunter Radcliff fell through a magic portal into another world of dangerous monsters.
Hailing from a family of Chosen Ones, he’s trained his whole life to be a hero. He just didn’t expect destiny to involve taming monster girls into semi-civilized adventurers. Or training them to form his tactical harem.
Or their giant robots. Or their conspicuous anime tropes. Or the geeky succubus “Sexy Wizard” who transformed them in the first place.
When a new minotaur girl shows up at his hot spring, he realizes the Sexy Wizard needs his help, too. She’s been captured by some of her own creations—but this time there’s a twist. These dragon ladies used to be two of his monster hunting friends, Jaz and Pix.
With all the isekai tropes tied up in his destiny, Axel expected a demon lord. What he didn’t expect was Demon Lord Jaspartina “Jaz” Red and her Demon Lord General Tailer “Pix” Weaver!
And, after a mere three months, he doesn’t have the stats to face his final boss.
Fortunately, his magic power grows with his romantic bonds. And he has a whole harem of devoted monster girls eager to help raise his stats.
WARNING: Monster Girl Tamer is a fun isekai LitRPG fantasy action adventure where the hero saves the day and gets all the girls. (So don’t read it and then complain about the spice. Y’all know exactly what you’re getting into.
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Enjoy a sample from I'M AN ISEKAI HERO! OF COURSE I'M FIGHTING A DEMON LORD
PROLOGUE
The summons came by Howitzer Beetle.More precisely, it came when the beetle buzzed through Jaz’s balcony bug net, blasted a stone through Pix’s bedroom window, then shouted “Hunters, I require you!” in a familiar, regal voice.
The Howitzer Beetle was distinct for the tube that ran from nasal opening to back. Articulate hind legs allowed it to toss debris inside, which it would then project at lethal, or at least very attention-getting speeds. This, combined with its ability to imitate speech like a parrot, made it Harly’s messenger of choice.
For, when the fusillade of a Howitzer Beetle woke you up, you answered.
So it was that Pix and Jaz rushed through the jungle.
“I can just smell the gems already!” Jaz practically drooled, bounding through a patch of carnivorous plants with all the enthusiasm of a track and field junkie. “Harly’s probably got an incredible bounty for us. Why else would she wake us up like that?”
Pix wove nimbly around the same obstacle—just as fast but much less noisily.
“It can’t be a regular bounty. There’s something else afoot here.”
Tailer “Pix” Weaver and Jaspartina “Jaz” Red matched as well as deep-fried potatoes and pepperpickle ice cream—which was to say, they shouldn’t have, but they did.
Pix, nicknamed thus for her bright red pixie cut, ran in a dark set of full-body leather armor with a heavily marked-up Hunter’s Handbook hanging from a shoulder strap. The scabbard at her waist held a vertically-split blade with a revolving cylinder sandwiched between its forte and hilt, but she clutched the book in a way that suggested she’d rather solve problems than fight them.
Jaz, meanwhile, sprinted in a plate mail bikini top segmented for maximum jiggle, red leather hot pants, and sunglasses on her sporty black hair. An enormous monsterbone greatsword bounced on one shoulder, her hand on its hilt in the manner of one who solved problems by bashing first.
“Now that you mention it”—Jaz somersaulted over a log—”how did Harly get her voice in the beetle? It’s not like she can talk. Not like us, anyway.”
“That’s why I’m suspicious,” Pix replied.
They knew the path well and soon pushed aside teal ferns to unveil an idyllic clearing, marked by a majestic waterfall that nourished the glen’s rolling greenery. A sweeping wonderland of butterflies and bioluminescent bugs fluttered about like fairy dust.
In the center of that whirl stood the woman.
She towered seven feet tall, including her headpiece, which resembled an old-timey wimple merged with a jester’s hat—or perhaps horns. Yes, more likely horns, for though her clothing brimmed fierce with color, it also brimmed fierce with armor. Sea green chitinous pieces hugged her voluptuous curves, except where they flared out into bustle or ballgown-esque flourishes.
The support was probably necessary, for the firm neckline of the chest plate cupped a pair of breasts so voluminous Pix half-expected them to attract satellites. Her face was sharp, with pouty, glamorous lips—and as if all that didn’t command sufficient attention, the jungle sun refracted through the sequin-like gems on her armor, casting a vibrant explosion of color through her immediate area.
Jaz flicked down her sunglasses to ease the eye strain.
The mysterious fashionista faced them with an imperious sneer.
“Finally, someone competent enough to help! Do you see this? My skeleton is on the inside!”
The voice was identical to the Howitzer Beetle’s.
“Harly?” Pix exclaimed. “Is that you?”
“Of course it’s me! How could you confuse this armor with anyone else’s? Even if what it contains is disgusting.”
Jaz frolicked up to examine Harly’s new shape. “So this isn’t a new form for fashion hunter week?”
“Of course not!”
“But you’d kill it on the catwalk!”
“I kill wherever I please.”
“I mean dress to kill.”
“I kill however I please, whether through violence or fashion, but that’s beside the point! Why would I change my original form? I was perfect! And now my beautiful skeleton is ON THE INSIDE!”
“I … can see how that’d be disturbing for you,” Pix mused.
For most people, that condition would have been the opposite of a problem—but Harly was not most people.
Whether she was a person at all was up for debate within the Society for the Exploration of the Monstrous Continent, because she was more commonly known as the Harlequin Mantis.
Her typical form was that of a three-story-tall mantid monster, her exoskeleton shaped into the chitin equivalent of a puffy-sleeved ballgown, and her antennae swept up into a playfully fashionable headdress. Gems grew along the spines that formed her artificial bustle, granting her a natural scattering of jewelry, and rendering her, truly, one of the most beautiful creatures on the continent. She rarely left her clearing to cause trouble, so the Society’s hunters usually left her alone.
Until one hunter hadn’t.
Until Jaspartina Red had gotten it in her head to stick an Earworm in the mantis’ ear … and through the telepathy it granted, learned she was a captivating conversationalist.
Too captivating to be of purely monster intelligence.
Which begged the question: What made a person a person, and a monster a monster, if some monsters could think like people?
Harly’s present form only complicated this question. Pix circled the woman more analytically than her partner.
“This wasn’t a voluntary transformation?”
“Absolutely not! What use would I have for this nonsense?” Harly smacked the side of her breasts. The resulting motion was the kind of absurd, hypnotic display that men would spend small fortunes to see on stage, even from the cheapest and most suspiciously stained of seats.
Even Jaz decided she wanted a closer look. She laid her greatsword on the ground, clicked a few gems to new positions, then mounted it like a surfboard. In a burst of pink and red flames, the rocket-powered greatsword conveyed her above and before Harly, because of course Jaz would customize her greatsword for flight.
She brought the greatsword into a flame-plumed hover and bent in for a conspicuous look.
“Wow. You could make bank in Skull Harbor with jugs like that. Could you imagine the striptease? Is your armor removable, or is it part of you? That could complicate things if—”
Harly waved a dismissive hand, the pointy tips of her hard elbow-length “gloves” rendering her all the more imperious.
“I’m not interested in such crass activities, nor men who won’t let me rip their heads off at the end of the night. Really, your legalities are so frustrating. How’s a female supposed to get off under those conditions? We monsters have no concept of ‘murder’ and we get along just fine.”
In retrospect, Pix thought, perhaps the casual acceptance of murder-for-the-purposes-of-arousal was the difference between people and monsters.
“We don’t rip the heads off our partners,” she said with a shiver.
“Oh, you poor, sheltered thing. The permanence of the death is part of the pleasure.”
Pix flailed her hands. “Can we stop talking about mantis mating rituals and get to why you called us here?”
“If you wish.” Harly gestured to herself with a revolted sneer. “I wish this handled. This humanoid spine is insufficient to support these monstrosities, and my back aches. I’ll pay you every gem on the last carapace I shed to capture the person who caused this and force him to change me back.”
“Not that I don’t appreciate the offer, but why hire us?” Jaz asked, taking a seat on her still-hovering greatsword. “You were a badass motherfucker in your original form, and you’re just a hotter BAMF in this one. Heck, you can one-shot most monsters when you want to, and now you’ve got built-in distractions!” She lowered her sunglasses at Harly’s chest.
“That’s just it; I don’t want to. I want to stay cozy by my waterfall eating bugs and sunbathing while I pay competent peasants to solve my problems for me.” She tilted her chin, then added, “You’re the peasants.”
“I can’t say we’d mind the pay.” Pix shrugged, long used to Harly’s insults.
“You know it’s a person?” Jaz asked. “Not some random magic or artifact from the sky or whatever?”
“Where exactly did your change happen?” Pix inquired.
“I was on a day trip to the Hellpits,” Harly said. “Its springs are quite invigorating, and their minerals fortify my exoskeleton nicely.”
“I thought you hated water,” Pix said. “Wasn’t that why you didn’t help us with the Screecher last time?”
“Hot springs are different. They’re soothing for both the chitin and the soul, and they don’t have fish shit in them. Anyway, I was preparing to leave when someone ran by my spring. I felt odd afterward, like I do when I’m in the mood to rip off some good head.”
“You mean you were horny?” Jaz guessed.
“I believe that’s your equivalent. Anyway, my body began to change soon after, and then my exoskeleton ejected me, in this form! The nerve! My own exoskeleton! The only coinciding event was the passing hunter, so I know he’s responsible.”
“You’re sure it’s a man?” Pix asked.
“No, but what other sort of person would saddle me with these ridiculous things?” She slapped her breasts again, eliciting yet another hypnotic gazong! “I’m not even a mammal!”
Pix and Jaz traded a glance. It had been some time since the last incident, but this situation sounded awfully similar to one they’d encountered two months ago. The monsters involved had been much lower level than Harly, but they’d still been turned into sexy Thicc Variant monster girls, all by a passing mysterious figure.
But given Harly’s … open-mindedness toward killing, Pix wanted to approach the situation carefully.
“I have some ideas,” Pix began, “but first I want to—”
“Sounds like the Sexy Wizard is behind this!” Jaz declared.
Pix sighed. Of course Jaz would blurt out what she’d hoped to hide.
Harly’s eyes perked with fresh interest. “The Sexy Wizard? Oh my. Can you describe his head for me? How satisfyingly do you think his neck would snap?” She shivered, the thought already making her wet, or whatever the Thicc Harlequin Mantis equivalent was.
Pix didn’t know and wasn’t curious enough to find out.
“The wizard isn’t a man.”
Harly drooped. “And here I thought this might take an interesting turn.”
“The Society’s already investigating her,” Pix continued, referring to the Society for the Exploration of the Monstrous Continent. “She’s turned at least two other monsters into monster girls.”
“Have any turned back?”
“No, but they don’t seem to be in any hurry to.”
“Why not?”
“They’re gettin’ good dick,” Jaz chimed, then perked with an idea of her own. “Do you think Harly’s meant to be one of Axel’s monster girls?”
“‘Meant to be’?” Harly furrowed her brow. “Who is this ‘Axel’ and what does he have to do with the Sexy Wizard?”
“He’s a Chosen One and he’s collecting monster girls to save the world or whatever. He’s wooed every monster girl the wizard’s created thus far into his harem, so maybe you’re a candidate? I mean, if he’s going to save the world, it’d be helpful to have a girlfriend with a magic beam cannon.”
“I am not a bug to be collected!” Harly snarled. “Nor am I a monster girl! These”—she smacked her breasts again—”are quite womanly traits!”
“What trope would she even fit?” Pix asked, trying to downplay the suggestion. “Don’t all Axel’s monster girls fit some kind of … He called it an ‘anime’ trope?”
“Oh! Yandere, definitely.” Jaz plunged into one of her pouches with the enthusiasm of a feral raccoon who’d just found a whole dumpster of crack, only to produce a beaten-up paperback featuring a sparsely-clothed, pointy-eared woman whose proportions defied the esoteric laws of time, space, physics only bespectacled bow tie-wearing sci-fi authors cared about, and probably a few RPG rule sets. The title of this Most Important Literary Work was The Second Coming of Beeflord Assgetter.
“It’s not anime,” Jaz continued, “but according to Axel, its tropes line up pretty closely. We talked about it during last month’s book club meeting. Anyway, wanting to rip a dude’s head off after sex definitely falls into the crazy girlfriend category, which is yandere to a T.”
“Yandere isn’t generic crazy,” Pix countered. “Based upon what Axel said, the yandere is crazy for the male lead, at the expense of people who threaten him.”
“What sort of book club is this?” Harly snatched the book from Jaz’s hands and thumbed through it.
“If anything, Harly’s the Princess trope,” Pix continued.
“Oh, that’s a much better fit!” Jaz exclaimed. “Harly, give us a laugh.”
Harly raised the back of her hand to her mouth and unleashed a high-pitched, musical, “OH-HO-HO-HO!” that left no doubt as to who was the most infuriatingly entitled of all royalty in the land. At least, until it devolved into a cackle worthy of a witch who’d finally gotten fed up with the princess’ shit and had a wicked curse waiting for her.
“Maybe Harly’s just Harly,” Pix observed with a shrug.
“I am not just me; I am absolutely me,” Harly preened. “But tell me more of this Axel, Sexy Wizard, and monster girl dick-getting. Is it truly so spectacular that it earns their complete allegiance?”
“There’s more to it than that, I think,” Pix said.
“The hot springs and the game nights are big pluses, too,” Jaz added.
“Hot springs?” Harly’s antennae-horns wiggled. “Is this where the dick happens?”
“Um, Harly?” Pix began nervously. “We know you’re a colossal eldritch-class monster, and in no way obliged to listen to us—”
“Yes.” Harly said it as a statement of fact rather than a question.
“But if you woo Axel, could you please not rip off his head? He’s the first useful Chosen One that’s fallen through the Skies, ever.”
“And he lets us come to Raging Cliff Hot Springs whenever we want,” Jaz chimed.
“Ah! I see the opportunity for a trade, then. You capture the Sexy Wizard and force her to change me back, and I’ll spare this eligible friend of yours.”
“Which also gives Axel motivation to help us find her!” Jaz exclaimed. “Win win! We could enlist him and his monster girls to help!”
“No!” Pix snapped. “Axel has nothing to do with this!”
“Why not? He’s already trying to find the Sexy Wizard!”
“Yes, but—Skies dammit, Jaz. He’s not trying to find her for the same reason Harly is. Or even the Society.”
“Why’s your Society trying to find her?” Harly asked.
“Because she’s turning monsters into powered-up monster girls,” Pix explained. “Axel’s tamed all the monster girls so far, but eventually she’s going to create one that’s a genuine danger. The Society wants to find her before she does that.”
“Why’s this ‘Axel’ trying to find her, then, if not to stop the danger she presents?” Harly took on a pensive look. “Does he want to force her to make more?”
“No, he’s not like that. He thinks she’s a monster girl, too, and he wants to help her.”
“Well. That just won’t do.” Harly crossed her arms and glared. “No one who moves my skeleton gets away with it.”
“What do you mean?”
“Maybe I’ll eat her. After she changes me back, of course.”
“That would be murder,” Pix stated firmly.
“Yes, I know how your laws work, much as I disagree with them. You’re only allowed to kill monsters—” Harly’s eyes gleamed. “Wait. If she’s a monster girl, does she count as a monster, or as a girl? Do the murder laws not apply to her? How does it work?”
That, too, was a subject under debate at the Society.
“The Society doesn’t allow us to act as hit men,” Pix replied. “Or in a way that makes us complicit in such behavior. We’ll help the Sexy Wizard turn you back, but we’re not going to let you kill her.”
“What if I throw in an extra carapace of gems?”
“Our morals aren’t for sale.”
“Mine are,” Jaz said, and Pix glared at her. “What? I’m just being honest here.”
Harly regarded them with an air of frustration, then shrugged the matter aside.
“I appreciate your honesty, and I suppose I can be satisfied with merely being changed back. When it comes down to it, you’ve done good work for me before. There are no other hunters I’d rather hire.”
“Aww, thanks!” Jaz beamed. “There’s no other mantis I’d consider taking morally-questionable bounties from!”
“We’ll set off to the area of the Hellpits where you encountered the Sexy Wizard as soon as possible,” Pix said, “and report back once we know something.”
A snide, sly smile slipped across Harly’s face. “Oh, you won’t be going alone.”
“Pardon?” Pix’s face quirked.
“What’s that face for?”
“You just had the most insidious smile I’ve ever seen.”
“Did I really?” Harly raised both hands and patted her soft, squishy cheeks. “I suppose I shall have to get used to facial expressions, too. Skies, I hate this body. I miss having a face that doesn’t emote.”
“What do you mean we won’t be going alone?”
Harly stopped squishing her face. “You said there were two other monster girls. Your information is outdated. There is another, and she works for me.”
She raised the back of her hand to her lips. Another villainous princess laugh trilled through the jungle, echoing with the weight of a whole lot of foreshadowing.